上海中考英语作文1
I Want To Invent A Family Doctor Robot
I want to invent a family doctor robot, which can be used to cure the illness without going out of their home. As far as I’m concerned, it will be extremely helpful and useful because of the following reasons:
First, you can see the doctor immediately at home when you feel sick or get hurt. It can save us a lot of time, especially in emergency situations.
Furthermore, hospitals today are always filled with patients, not everyone can be taken good care of. However, with the help of our robot doctors, you can talk to your personal doctor one to one whenever you want.
In short, family doctor robots can make great contribution to our society.
精彩亮点分析：
亮点一：全文巧用“first, furthermore, in short” 等连接词，把家庭机器人医生的好处写的非常清晰，让阅卷老师一目了然。
亮点二：全文采用了定语从句、状语从句、并列句等多种长难句，为文采分增色不少。
亮点三：文中出现了“extremely, make contribution to” 这些超纲单词及词组，恰到好处地强调了家庭机器人医生的重要性，且为文采再次进行润色。
上海中考英语作文2
I want to invent healthy cigarette
There are a great number of people who smoke around us, including women and men, even some students. As we all know, a cigarette can contain plenty of toxic materials which are not only harmful to themselves, but also to others. Therefore,I think it is necessary to invent healthy cigarette. If people use it when they want to smoke, it can be used to reduce the bad influence which is caused by the real cigarette.
For our beautiful future and human beings, healthy cigarette should be made.
When I grow up, I want to be an inventor. Healthy cigarette will be my first invention.
精彩亮点分析：
亮点一：考纲外语法定语从句使用
亮点二：not only…but also 不但…而且…
亮点三：宾语从句
亮点四：if条件状语从句
亮点五：When引导的时间状语从句
上海中考英语作文3
I want to invent a spaceship
Travelling in universe has always been a dream of us human being. So I want to invent a spaceship which can take us far away from our mother planet into the endless space.It can be used to save people as well. We may face very severe environmental problems in the foreseeable future. So people may get away with these life-saving spaceships and live in a whole new planet. This kind of spaceship will mark a new era in human history.
精彩亮点分析：
亮点一：第二句话运用定语从句表达出“时光机”的作用。
亮点二：in the foreseeable future 在可预见的未来。
亮点三：最后一句结尾用mark的动词词性表达“开创人类新纪元”。
上海中考英语作文4
I want to invent a flying car
It is not uncommon to meet traffic problems and serious air pollution in big city.It is a must to have a plan to improve the serious condition.
I get an idea to design my own flying machine like a car which can drive well in the street as well as fly between the high rises to avoid the traffic jam. What’s more, when it is moving ,it can transform the motion energy into electricity to drive the engine. Thus, it is possible to save a lot of fuel and reduce the air pollution. It is of great useto solve the problems of traffic jam and air pollution ,and even save the natural resource.
Bright idea can only be achieved with the determination and courage. I believe my idea will turn a new leaf of future life.
精彩亮点分析：
亮点一：高分短语
亮点二：it is a must 活用高频词
亮点三：定语从句描述自己设计的汽车
亮点四：高分短语
亮点五：be of great use 名词结构更高端
亮点六：被动语态，丰富句式
亮点七： turn a new leaf of future life 翻开未来生活的新篇章
上海中考英语作文5
I want to invent a time machine
As a student who is experiencing unprecedented modern life nowadays, I would rather learning about the history and the future life of human being from a real experience than learning from a textbook. That’s why if I can work as a great inventor, inventing a time machine will be my first choice. The most important usage of my time machine will be visiting one of best schools in Tang Dynasty. As we all know, Tang Dynasty is famous for its open-minded education. Therefore, when I visit the school of the ancient city, I cannot only try different ways of studying but communicate with people from different countries as well. Using a time machine is the most vivid way to learn history as it is both a record of mankind and a mirror of past, I am looking forward to the day when my time machine comes out.
精彩亮点分析：
亮点一：定语从句修饰对学生现在的生活
亮点二：用would rather … than … 表达学生的意愿
亮点三：用if条件状语从句表达主题
亮点四：be famous for 因…而著名
亮点五：not only … but … as well 不但…而且…
亮点六：用动名词词组做主语
亮点七：用idiom突出历史的重要性
亮点八：定语从句表达学生的期待
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